Is this a Test?

So far I have been WAY more stressed out about the twins starting school than they are. They wake up EVERY day asking "Do we have school today?" "Can we go to school today Mom? Please?"


There is much gnashing of teeth and tears if it is not a school day. "Why can't I go to school today". "I want to go to school!"

BUT if it is a school day the boys gobble up their breakfast, get dressed, and walk around with their backpacks on saying "goodbye, Mom" until we head out for school.

I, on the other hand, am getting more and more confused every time they bring home another bag full of papers. Here are some examples of what I mean....

Last week Jonah and Sam brought home a note that said that they have Show and Tell on Friday September 24. Ok that will be fun.

Then the note said "Please no toys."

Hmmmmm. What does a three year old bring to school to show off that isn't a toy? John said "have them bring a stuffed animal." Um, yeah that's a toy.

Then John said "How about a book?" No, that's just dumb. The school is full of books.

Is this a riddle? A show and tell item for a 3 year old that is not a toy......


I've got it Alex! What is a rock? Is that right?

Actually, Grandpa Bill and Grandma Kathie got the boys Petoskey stones this summer and that might work. As long as the boys don't use them as weapons. Or eat them.

Then we got another note home from school that said that we are in charge of snack on September 22. For 25 kids. It has to be a HEALTHY snack. No nuts or peanuts. No chocolate.

I've got Alex! What is cheese? Is that right?

No.

A subsequent note said that there is a field trip to a park on September 22.

And by field trip I mean that we are supposed to drive our kids to the designated park and STAY with them the entire time. WE are in charge of our kids. Not the teacher! Yuck! I am paying you to bring my own kids to the park and play with them while you sit and watch?

Interesting.

Anyways, are we supposed to bring our snack to the park? Or should we wait until September 24th instead? Clearly, cheese will not work if we are going to bring it to the park.

So, I had to e-mail the teacher and find out. Yes, we are in charge of snack at the field trip. It should be in ziplock bags and shelf stable. It has to be healthy with no nuts, peanuts, or chocolate.


I know Alex! What are crackers? Is that right?

My mind is spinning. This is a lot to figure out. Remember that commercial from the 80's? This is your brain. This is your brain on drugs!

Mine should say... This is your brain. This is your brain on 4 kids! Not pretty.

So excuse me when I can't figure out all of the notes and rules (crap, I just remembered that I forgot to send a change of clothes to the twins preschool in case they pee. Which they will probably do soon. Like tomorrow). I just need you to tell me what to bring.

I want a note in the twins bag that says "On Sept. 22 send 2 rocks and 25 bags of pretzels to school." I could handle that.

I don't want options.

So I decided that we are going to skip the field trip on Wednesday. We are going to enjoy a mental health day. We are going to stay home and eat chocolate covered PEANUTS and play with TOYS. I can definitely handle THAT!